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Autobiography

John Stuart Mill · c. 1850-1858 primary

passage 103 of 143 · CHAPTER I 1806-1819 > CHAPTER VII. (4/44)

in brief
Mill recounts his principal friendship with Harriet Taylor, noting her living between the country and London with her husband, and Mill’s visits that were meant to avoid any discredit.

name of friendship, in a really earnest mind. All these circumstances united, made the number very small of those whose society, and still more whose intimacy, I now voluntarily sought.

Among these, by far the principal was the incomparable friend of whom I have already spoken. At this period she lived mostly with one young daughter, in a quiet part of the country, and only occasionally in town, with her first husband, Mr. Taylor. I visited her equally in both places; and was greatly indebted to the strength of character which enabled her to disregard the false interpretations liable to be put on the frequency of my visits to her while living generally apart from Mr. Taylor, and on our occasionally travelling together, though in all other respects our conduct during those years gave not the slightest ground for any other supposition than the true one, that our relation to each other at that time was one of strong affection and confidential intimacy only. For though we did not consider the ordinances of society binding on a subject so entirely personal, we did feel bound that our conduct should be such as in no degree to bring discredit on her husband, nor therefore on herself.

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topics: friendship and loyalty · honor, shame, and reputation · the position of women

Autobiography · John Stuart Mill · 1850–1858